Has it always been this way for me or have I always been so confident or brave? Well the answer to those questions is no. I have not always been so strong or faithful. I have had doubt and I have question God our Father, Why must I go through these, trails, tribulations, test, confusion, mess and struggles? I have also asked God, Why are people so mean, hateful, destructive, heartless and cruel. I have also asked him, Why do some good people die and why do most bad people always seem to prosper? Then I have asked God this very personnel questions , Why is it that the people I love and trust the most are the very ones causing me this pain?
Answers to those questions have been revealed to me in very different ways. Some have been revealed to me through the Bible, others through sermons from my Pastor, then some were answered by my wise parents or friends. But the main questions were answered by God himself. I was explain to in a dream that most of my problems, bad situations ,troubles or pains were not because of anyone else and also it was because I did not listen to him. I did not heed God warnings and I did not walk into those open doors that he provided me with. I let fear or doubt keep me from escaping my troubles and I also let them keep me from being blessed. Instead of listening to God I chose to instead listen to man. When I should have just trusted God, then walked by faith and not by sight. That way I would have been blessed sooner, rather than latter. It was all my fault and now that I know the reason why I have changed .I learn from those storms that has made me both stronger and wiser. So now when the next storm heads my way, I do not fear it, because I know that I can get through it some how! I fear Mondays no more , even relish them and then look forward to them. I am grateful for my bad situations because I know they only make me stronger and have me better prepared for the future. I also know that going through them , I can learn how to avoid new ones and also I can help others avoid them too. I can give advice to my children, friend's or family, then be a blessing to them and others. I realized this without God, I wouldn't have made it through those storms . I also realize that, if had just listen and practice a little faith those storms that I went through, could have been avoided. Some storms that people go through is just another step or chapter in a person life. If you happen to be blessed enough to read this journal, just know this that God has ordered your steps and its already written or done.
2 Corinthians 1:24
Not that we lord it over your faith, but we work with you for your joy, because it is by faith you stand firm.