Wednesday, February 8, 2012

Its Over Now

Today, I over heard a woman complaining about her husbands, past mistakes. She went on complaining to one of  her girlfriends how bad of a husband she has and how bad he treated her in their past. But what she failed to mention was that they were still together and those mistakes he made was far in their  distant past. After she got through talking about her husband, she thought she would get a mans point of view so she asked me these questions . She said to me Charles is it so wrong to hold on to something that happen so long ago?Why is it so hard to forgive my husband? He is a good man and I know that he is not perfect and neither am I. But I have a hard time forgiving him and forgetting what he has done. She went on to say I have always been told in order to go to Heaven, you have to forgive the person who has wrong you and to leave the past in the past. So please tell me what can I do to finally move on so I could love my husband in a way a wife is suppose to love her husband.

 After she was finished I smiled and said," Well first you have to leave you problems or troubles with our Father in Heaven". Then she said, "Charles, I know that and I have tried ". I have prayed many times and nothing seems to work or  happen. Then I said, "Well that's because you are being impatient and not giving God time to heal you". I went on too tell her that, "God hears your prayers and when the time is right he will bless you with the necessary strength or wisdom to over come your fears or pain. Then she looked at me with tears in her eyes and said, "I love him Charles, but I am having a hard time forgiving him! He cheated on me with that woman and sometimes when I am with him all I can see is her. Lord knows I have tried Charles, but I am scared. Then I asked her what was she afraid of, then she said to me that she was scared that he might cheat on her again and do the same thing all over again.

Then I looked at her and said It hurt doesn't it? Then she looked at me with a mean look and said, Yes! Of course it hurts what do you think? Then I smiled at her and said, How do you think God feels when we do something wrong or sin against him? Then she couldn't say anything. Then I went on to tell her despite all of our sins , God sacrificed his only son Jesus so that we may live. God forgave us and each of us are obligated to forgive others. You say that you love your husband, but you don't forgive him. Don't you realize that love and forgiveness are link together? Then she said to me Charles I do love my husband, but I don't know how to forgive him. I need help she said, pleased help me forget. Then I said to her, that it not required that you forget, but it is required that you forgive. If you pray, then ask God to take away your pain, in time he will answer your prayers. But first you have to stop doubting yourself and your marriage. God has allowed it to survive all the years for a reason. With some hard work many prayers and lots of sacrifice your marriage will blossom into something beautiful. You just have to trust God and truly give your problems to him. Then I looked at her and asked her this question, Remember you told me that your husband hurt you in your past and now he is doing better? Then she said ," Yes I remember". Then I said, Well part of your prayers has already been answered and  its over. One day soon both you and your husband will talk about what each of you went through. You will talk about the many battles, obstacles or storms that you each had to over come, just to make it too where God has you going. One day soon with the blessing of God you shall have a beautiful marriage. Every marriage requires hard work, a lot of time and  plenty of patience. None are successful over night, so just be patient and trust God more. Then she smiled and said" Okay , I will try". And then I said, All God requires is that you try, then give  all of your burdens to him . God always answers prayers and when God moves things happen.

If you happen to be reading this always remember, whats in the past should stay in the past. Everyone of us carries a little baggage or have somethings in our closets that we may want to forget and don't want others to know about. In order to move on each of us must deal with our past and then get on with our future. There is no way person can take it back what they have said or done. In order to move on you must forgive the person that has hurt them and then themselves. Its always important too learn from ones mistakes. That way one will always be prepared too never let it happen again. Forgive, but never forget that God has allowed you to go through these things, just to show you how strong you really are. Remember through God, all things are possible and with him in your life, you can or shall over come all things. Tell yourself this tonight or  even in the morning, that my past is my past and Its Over Now .

Have a blessed weekend,
1 Peter 4:8 Above all, keep fervent in your love for one another, because love covers a multitude of sins.
I Corinthians 13-4
4 Love is patient, love is kind and is not jealous; love does not brag and is not arrogant, 5 does not act unbecomingly; it does not seek its own, is not provoked, does not take into account a wrong suffered, 6 does not rejoice in unrighteousness, but rejoices with the truth; 7 bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things.


  1. When my ex husband cheat on me, it was hard to accept that he did that to. I was very angry but until I went to a divorce seminar and learned some things about myself, asked my ex to forgive me for somethings and asked him to tell me the real reason he cheated. After that I was free and with the Lord's help. Today, I am very cordial with him, and what's so ironic he doesn't understand why I am not angry at him which makes him thing I want him back. I have no desire for him,, I have moved on, just free. Thank you Jesus

  2. I can relate to that. I went through the same situation, one thing that is different I never asked my ex husband the reason why he did the things he did. I guess it really did not matter, because of whom I am in Christ. I can tell you this what I went though was a lesson learned, and now I feel good about myself because it did not change me to become a bitter person. I love who I have become in Christ and He has taken my life in a new direction.