When I first became a father at the very young age of twenty-one, I never really understood what it meant to be a father. At that time my daughter was born, I was just learning for myself what it took to become a man. I was going to college, working two jobs, clubbing and doing what most twenty-one year old do at that age. I remember getting that phone call from my current girl friend that I was going to become a father. At first I didn't know how to take the news of becoming a father. I thought wow, I am too young to be a father. My other thought was how am I going to be able to take care of a baby, when I am having a hard time taking care of myself? Do we get married, even though we really don't have a sound relationship?Then I has this thought, what did I get myself into? Why didn't I wear protection? That was a lot to take in for a young man just trying to find himself. I can remember my fathers words when he heard the news, he would say," Chuck, you laid down with that woman and acted like an adult, now its time to grow up and be one.
Any man that has heard those words for the very first time would be scared. I must admit I was scared, confused and very unprepared. Thank God for two very loving parents who must have knew that I wasn't prepared to be a father and sure wasn't prepared to be a parent. It took me some time to realize that there is a big difference between a father or a mother and a single parent. After some years pass by I was blessed with another child( A baby boy). God fixed it that I would be present when he was born. I got to witness child birth and all I can say what an experience. It was amazing, to see something so beautiful being born. To any man who may read this, if you happen to have a woman that is carrying your child, please witness the birth. I did and it changed my life! I knew from that moment on that I wanted to be more involved in my children's lives. I was determined to be involved and I wanted my children to know who their father was. So I went out bought my sons crib, then went to the department store , then bought him clothes, bottles and made one room in my apartment a room just for him. I loved my baby boy and felt that nothing would ever come between us.
At the time of my sons birth his mother and I were not a couple. But I assured her that I would do my job as a father and help raise our son. I thought his mother and I had a sound agreement, but as you know nothing happens as planned. She fought me every step of the way. She denied me visits and she only wanted me to see our son, when she received support for our child. Our child became a tool she would use only to get money and when she received the money, it wasn't spent on our son. At times I was both furious and helpless at the same time. Here I was a father that wanted to be apart of my child's life, but because we weren't involved, she used him to her advantage. Living like this was a living hell. I found myself praying and asking God for help. As fate would have it I ended up years later having custody of my child. My prayers were answered because I soon found out that I was not only am I a father, but also a single parent. I never knew what those words meant until my own son explained it too me today. He said these words today that made think and proud at the same time. He said ,"I always knew that you were my Father, because my mother told me so". But when I began to live with you then you became my parent. A father only is only a father because he provided the necessary ingredients to make a baby. But a real parent raises the child and becomes responsible for it. You dad are my father and my parent.
Those words that my son expressed to me made me proud to be a father. Has raising my son alone been easy? No, as a matter of fact I was told that I couldn't do it and I was also told that I would make a terrible parent. But I was determined to raise him and get him ready for the outside world. Now he is making good grades, healthy and a very respectable kid. One day with Gods blessings he will turn into a God Fearing man. I learn while raising my son, times may be difficult, but with God in the mist all things are possible. My experience raising my son has been a blessing. It has helped me grow as a man and it also helped me to respect the mothers of the world that raise children by themselves without the help of their fathers. Being a parent I learned a lot about myself. I learned love is not just buying something for someone, love is also caring about another person needs. Sometimes your child just needs to know that you will be there for them, through their failures and as well as their success. All you have to do while raising your children, is to be both positive and strong,encourage them to be what ever they want to be and always tell them that with God in their lives all things are possible to achieve.To all the mothers and fathers in the world, be more than mothers or fathers,be parents and show your child or children real love. Also to the mothers of the world, that don't allow the fathers visitation, please do not allow the world or the devil to come between this very important union. Every child needs their fathers as well as their mothers. Yes a mothers love is precious, but a fathers love will stay with a child for a lifetime. For God our Father In Heaven loves and admires a loving parent. Those who love and raise their children unselfishly will be blessed for as long as they live. A Fathers Love.
May God bless you all always,
Charles
.John 16:27
No, the Father himself loves you because you have loved me and have believed that I came from God.
John 16:28
I came from the Father and entered the world; now I am leaving the world and going back to the Father."
John 16:30
Now we can see that you know all things and that you do not even need to have anyone ask you questions.
This makes us believe that you came from God."